The Gift of Deep Listening

I suspect that the most basic and powerful way to connect with another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention—and especially when it comes from the heart.

When people are talking, there’s no need to do anything but receive them. Just take them in. Listen to what they’re saying. Care about it. Most times, caring about it is even more important than understanding it.

Formulating an opinion is not listening. Neither is preparing a response, defending our position, or attacking another’s. To listen impatiently is to hear nothing at all.

Listening is Suspending Disbelief

True listening is about being open and receptive. It means paying attention with no preconceived ideas, judgments, or distractions. We listen not to reply, but to understand.

The only goal is to fully and clearly comprehend what is being expressed, while remaining totally present with the speaker. We allow their words and emotions to be exactly what they are.

Anything less is not only a disservice to the speaker but also to yourself.

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